3 big mistakes of my life

Last 3 days have been the most terrible days of my life. But with every terrible experience life teaches you new things. I have genuinely experienced now, that what LONELINESS actually means. What’s life after graduation. It’s fucking difficult to take your own decisions and be proud of them whether they are right or wrong. It’s easy to crib and fucking difficult to be in someone else’s shoes.
I’ve been lonely for three consequent days and nights with my parents there to support, with people around me, and friends there to be proud of me. Lonely as hell. All alone with my decision which I wasn’t sure of. With plenty of expectations in mind, all broken into pieces as each minute passed. I felt so helpless that I could barely smile. Life had already taken a turn, and the closest of people were there to expect but not to support. I was hurt. Every time I thought about it, I said to myself do not expect, and then I looked at my call log and my message inbox that whether I have a sign of support from the person I expected to be there. Then I realised a lot of things in life.
I went into an imaginative trip. I saw a group of friends coming out of college campus, enjoying life to the fullest, telling each other to remain friends forever. And then they see the crowd outside college. My imagination turned into an animation blog. Crowd stood in rows and columns. Each of the friends tried to get into one line. When the first one got in, another felt he was ditched. He thought about the promise to always be together and be friends forever. Slowly and steadily everyone got into one or another line but they all were far away now. Each line suited best for them but being in the same line was against their destiny. The lines moved either back or front and they moved with the line. They occasionally met and fought, had hard feelings and some just stopped talking. But as they grew, they cherished the time they could meet and thanked the destiny about it.
I learnt three biggest mistakes of my life in past three days

1. Being in one sided love is the biggest mistake I committed. That too for 4 fucking years. And even after 4 years I expected. I expected him to be there, like a fool when I knew he will never be... dummmm because it was 1 sided.
-------LEARNING- your one sided love can never be your good friend, whether you take him as a good friend or not, he will never, coz he will always think you are fucking in love.

2. It’s being coward to not backup your decisions especially when they were wrong. World is there to crib and criticise and I am also a part of the world so I understand it better. There are friends who will scold you, explain you or may be even hit you for your wrong decisions, but will be there no matter what. And some will just ignore thinking it’s their life and who am I to say anything and go off to sleep. The first ones are true friends.
-----LEARNING- stop understanding and analysing friends. They will prove themselves when the true time arrives. YOU WILL ALWAYS BE LONELY IN LIFE. STOP DEPENDING; EVEN FOR SUPPORT. SUPPORT YOUR SELF, U’LL NEVER REGRET.

3. The most important of all. But dicey to draw lines. Extreme of either which will spoil your life. PHILOSPHY & PRACTICALITY. PHILOSOPHY IS GOOD FOR MIND BUT BAD FOR STOMACH & PRACTICALITY IS GOOD FOR STOMACH BUT BAD FOR MIND.
------LEARNING- practically realise your needs and priorities in life and then work with some ideals and philosophy so that you don’t go on the wrong tracks. The most important thing is to have your own thoughts, ideals and ethics according to your own sensibilities. You can’t set your priorities according to bookish philosophies and philosophy of others. Think by yourself, according to your sensibilities.
FURTHER LEARNING: - UNDERSTANDING YOUR OWN SENSIBILITIES IS HIGHLY DIFFICULT, FOR THAT ONE NEED’S TO BLANK HIS SLATE.